quotes of the week

Regarding the need for a receipt when you take back your own Christmas tree you cut down yourself from the forest:

"One year the Forest Service set up a blockade. They caught a lot of Hmong people, too. You know what they found? Squirrels! They had killed all the squirrels and were taking them back with them!"

- The old lady who sold us our Christmas tree last Saturday

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Regarding the Hmong people's apparent affinity for squirrel meat:

"At least they don't waste them."

- Christmas tree lady

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To Dr. James, a regular early morning drive-thru customer at my Starbucks store:

"Will you tell me if this sounds like bronchitis? [Pause for inhale] *COUGH!*"

- one of my fellow baristas, who has been recovering from a cold

Dr. James went on to give her a quick diagnosis from his car. We owe him a free drink.

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